Enjoy More Joys Than Sorrows in Your Retirement

Aging is not for sissies. Not only will your body start reminding you of all of those merry days and nights when you ignored it, hoping faintly you could do so for ever and with impunity. Your income will change dramatically, too.

Now what? Well, you have a simple choice: accept it, sit down in your rocking chair and wait till death do us part. Or, on the other hand, you will NOT accept it and live life to the fullest. You will find that – theoretically, at least – you ought to have much more time to live life to the fullest now that you don't have to be in the office from nine to five. Guess what? You're barely coping.

That's called the Parkinson's Law effect: work (or any other activity, for that matter) fills the time that is available. (You should obtain a copy of the law in any good bookstore. You won't regret it. It will add more laugh wrinkles to your face, and these are the best wrinkles one can have.)

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But seriously, how you retire depends on you, and nobody else.

Let's say you worked for a big corporation, and one of the benefits included deductions from your paycheque for company pension, and if your employer was really good, they would contribute, too (or match your contribution, even). Now's the time to start reaping the benefits: instead of paying into the pension fund, the pension fund will start paying you. You will add the amount to whatever the government pays you (Canada Pension Plan payments, a.k.a. CPP, Old Age Security, a.k.a. OAS, you can qualify for the Guaranteed Income Supplement a.k.a. GIS, except. if you're getting your company pension, that might more often than not disqualify you.

If you were really smart, you started planning for your retirement right after high school graduation. Especially if your parents decided to teach you how to and started an RRSP account for you, as a graduation present, instead of buying you a fancy car. Upon learning that whatever you contribute to that account – up to the limit that the government tells you about in your annual income tax assessment – gets you off the hook so far as taxes go, you impose serious discipline on your finances and contribute faithfully. But the irony is that, if you take money out of the fund, it gets taxed.

And now, a warning: There are companies that proclaim to all and sundry that they can provide you with a tool that lets you withdraw funds from an RRSP account for free. Before you even think of considering such schemes, you might as well find out what the Canada Revenue Agency thinks of them. Be warned in advance: the government's thoughts border on the dismissive, to put it mildly.

Beware telemarketing offers

Another thing: how do the crooks find out that you've just retired that is another question. But, all of a sudden, the phone won't stop ringing, telling you of this or that wonderful thing to buy, and it's going to make you a king or queen, whichever applies, in your world, and how you could have lived without this or that product all your life till now is beyond comprehension, but now's your chance, you know the drill. Yes, many of us tend to get rude when the phone rings for the umpteenth time just as we're sitting down for supper with our children and grandchildren. There's really no need to be rude. Not only do you set a bad example for your grandkids, but also, the person on the other end of the line is usually a student or a senior, who needs the cash. The real crooks are the people who employ them.

In any case, this brings us to another angle. Quite a few of us have been saying since age, say, 30, that they can't wait till they retire. Imagine all the golfing and fishing and whatnot! Yes and no. For whatever reason, many of us miss the working routine. Never mind the money. If you really, REALLY feel you need either the routine or the money (or both), go for a part-time job. Preferably doing something you've always thought of doing but never got around to doing. Of course, no, the idea of working part-time as captain on a Jumbo jet after a career as a master plumber or something like that won't get beyond the stage of a dream, but there have been many accountants who became professional gardeners, for example. Bad enough that your family now thinks they can have their plumbing work done for free. You're retired, after all, you've got all day.

You never know enough

And here's an idea: universities and colleges across the country offer all kinds of courses. Some of them will just enhance or extend your knowledge in a field you've been always interested in, some of them will open vistas that are completely new to you, and some of them will teach you skills that you will decide to use in a brand new profession. What happens then? Say, you will use some of your RRSP money to pay for the course. On one hand, you will be taxed for the withdrawal, on the other hand, you will be writing the course fee off your income. Makes sense, does it not?

And while you're walking around with a brand new diploma in your hand, you may decide to use the newly gained education to find a job. Here's the trick how to make yourself appealing to a potential employer: you will not be seeking wages at the top of the scale since you're new to the profession, but you will be also offering an intangible: life experience. That counts for something.

A guy who retired recently decided to spend as much time as he could on the slopes, skiing. So, he went and bought himself a card for seniors that covers the entire year. What is it? asked a colleague of his. That, said the new senior citizen, is an old fart (excuse the expression) card. Your approach to things is wrong, the colleague said. This is an experienced user card.

And that's the way to enjoy your retirement.

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