How to Solve that Neighbour Dispute Without a Lawsuit

There have been epic neighbour battles throughout the history of time and pop culture. None more drawn out than the battle between According to Jim's Jim Belushi and Julie Newmar, best known for playing Catwoman in the '60s era Batman TV series. The two lived next door peacefully until 2004, when Belushi wanted to heighten a fence around his property for more privacy, but Newmar complained that the higher fence robbed her prized roses of sunlight.

From there, the fence feud spiraled out of control. Both took public and private swipes at each other, with Belushi accusing Newmar of tearing down his fence and egging his house and she shot back with the assertion that he was such a noisy neighbour, she had to buy a set of air traffic controller earmuffs. The feud finally came to its epic climax when Belushi sued Newmar for $4 million, alleging harassment, defamation and vandalism.

However, handling the jerk next door doesn't always have to be settled in a courtroom. Below are a variety of strategies Julie and Jim should have tried first.

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Try Not to Make Mountains Out of Molehills

Don't just create a conflict because your neighbour pisses you off, take your emotions out of it and focus on the facts. What are they actually doing? How does it legitimately impact you? It's far from, "Belushi is a jackass because he wants to make his fence taller."

Instead Newmar should have thought, "the tall fence blocks the sun, which could make my roses go limp." She should've then sized up the situation and consider whether this was an issue actually worth confronting Belushi with? She also needed to decide what she wanted to see happen in the long run. Of course, she wanted to see Belushi keep his fence at it's original height, but maybe she was willing to make some concessions of her own. All this is something you too should think about before confronting your neighbour.

Talk it Out

That old sacrine saying,"You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar may be a cliche, but it applies when it comes to confronting your neighbour about an issue. No one is going to do what you want if you start calling them names. It's important to level your concerns without blame and actively listen to the response (listen to what they're really saying). Give a real honest attempt at coming to a mutually agreed upon solution.

Maybe Belushi shouldn't have made his fence quite so high, ensuring Newmar's roses still had some son, but maybe Newmar should've tried to put her roses in a different location, one where the sun's rays were not blocked by the fence. Of course, in there is the grey of compromise. You just have to be clear. Also, if a solution is agreed upon and you expect your neighbour to participate or pay for part of it, let them know before putting the plan into action. After all, they may not want to split the difference, even after the solution goes over budget, and if that's the case, let it go. It's definitely easier than holding a grudge, so call it a learning experience. Get a contract together that's iron clad if you care that much. But, if you get it done yourself, settling the dispute doesn't cost any time or money and your relationship can endure and pay off with many lasting benefits.

Try Free Community Mediation

If you and your neighbour can't come to an agreement on your own, there's always mediation. A mediator is a unbiased and impartial third party whose goal it is to have the parties reach an agreement that both are satisfied with. The meetings typically last less than a day and 80% of mediations are settled before going to court, with another 5% resolved shortly afterward.

If they can agree they sign a mediation contract, which most people are inclined to abide by even though it's not legally binding. Some communities have free mediation run by volunteers who are taught a structured approach for resolving issues. They typically meet with each neighbour individually before getting both parties together to begin the mediation session. Condo boards also offer free mediation that they require residents go through before anything goes to court. In addition to the residents in question, the property manager and the director of the condo board usually attend the mediation session. It is the condo board that takes on the mediator's actual fee.

Pay for the Mediator if You Can't Get One for Free

If free mediation isn't available, you and your neighbour could always pay for it. The ADR Institute of Canada is an organization that promotes mediation nationally and has a directory of mediators on its website.Usually you'll be looking to pay between $1,500 to $3,000 for a half-day to full-day meeting. The cost is usually split between you and your neighbour and paid to the mediator right after the meeting.

Even if you have filed a lawsuit, your lawyers may still recommend mediation and they will be in attendance to represent your side, especially if you're not talking to your neighbour. In addition to the mediation fee, which you split, you will also have to pay the $5,000 to $8,000 lawyer fee and any damages you agree to in mediation.

The Last Resort is Court

If you've tried resolving the dispute yoursel and you've gone through mediation and still can't find a solution, unless you agree to disagree and never speak to each other again, the last resort is court. Court battles can get furious and realize that the buck stops there. Regardless of what either of you think, there will be one winner and one loser and the judge will make a decision that you will have to live with.

The lawsuit will cost you thousands of dollars and the size of your claim categorizes you into the court that will hear your case. Depending on your province, if the amount is between $5,000 and $25,000 your case will be heard in small claims. This is where you represent yourself without a lawyer and the onus is on you to collect your judgement amount if you win. Beyond that amount, the case will be heard in Superior Court and you will have a lawyer. However, if you lose you will likelt have to pay your neighbour's legal expenses as well as your own, including the damages you're required to pay. A dispute over a fence and some roses can cost you over $60,000 or, in the case of Jim Belushi and Julie Newmar, over $4 million, which is what Belushi eneded up suing for.

Happily Ever After

Luckily, their dispute was settled in mediation for an undisclosed amount and Newmar later poked fun of the "War of the Roses" as a guest on According to Jim. Even celebrities learn, it's better to settle the issue as soon as possible, instead of going to court.