Grad Moving Home? Five Life and Money Tips To Help Them and You

It's not an easy time to be a recent graduate. According to Statistics Canada, the average income for a person age 25-29 with a post-secondary degree is about $32,000 while Canadian student debt is at an all-time high. A recent poll by BMO suggests most university and college students who take out loans to pay for their schooling expect to graduate owing more than $20,000. It's also not an easy time to be a parent as many graduating students take shelter back at home with Mom and Dad. And when an adult child moves home, it means extra costs involved in everything from water and electricity use to groceries and gas in the car. But there are ways to negotiate how to make it work for you and your adult child so everyone knows their role and feels the situation is fair. I spoke with life coach and boomer expert Terri Benincasa about how parents of young adults can navigate the awkward time between post-grad and independence.
Here are her tips:

1. Have a chat and be upfront about expectations.
Sit down and have a chat in advance of your grad moving home to set expectations. What will his responsibilities be? Will he need a part time job while he's staying with you to help out a little financially? Or, could he be in charge of maintaining the lawn and the outside of the house?
The sooner you have this conversation the better because the longer you wait, the more deeply set into a routine you'll become.

2. Discuss an end goal.
It's important to talk about how long your adult child will be staying with you. Let her know how long you see the situation lasting. This can actually be a motivating force in helping your grad get off the couch and find a job, since there is an end date in sight.

3. Put it in writing.
It doesn't have to be an intimidating document but get the agreed responsibilities down on paper and sign it together. Then you won't run into excuses down the road like 'I didn't understand' or 'I forgot' and it will make what you've discussed more meaningful.

4. Help and encourage them but don't do it for them.
The best thing you can do is use your own wisdom, built from years of experience, to give them ideas on how they can further their skills. Drop hints about volunteer work to beef up their resume. Or if they seem depressed and unable to make decisions, suggest counseling. Whatever you do, don't start applying for jobs for them. "Running into bumps along the road is the road," says Benincasa. So, it's best to help them deal with the situation rather than doing their work out of sympathy or pity.

5. Fuel their fire with your own resources.
If your graduate can contribute money to the "family pot", put it towards helping him achieve independence. Let him know the money he's contributing is actually being saved for something positive like his first month's rent when he's ready to move on. Or, if putting away a bit of money is not an option, think of other ways you can help to inspire him.
If you belong to a business group, invite him to go along to a meeting and network with you. Or introduce a friend who works in a field that interests him.

Related Links:

How to Ensure Your Kids Won't Move Back Home After University

10 Things College Students Need to Save Money

Changing Jobs: Five Tips to Guide You